When your action as
a husband becomes abusive, then there is a problem!
Why would you act
in such a way?
Why would you beat
up your wife?
Why would you be
impatient, irrational, and angry for any and every mistake your wife makes?
Why would you turn
your home to a fighting arena?
Does your a wife
action or behaviour warrant such abuse?
Do you think by
beating her, she would listen to you and change?
Have you examined
yourself to know why she acts the way she does?
Too many questions,
right? But, you need to think and ask
many questions to understand why you fight?
I just want to know
if there is any marriage where beating has changed a wife positively. Are there
any testimonies? Is there any husband
who has publicly acknowledged beating up his wife and was celebrated? If there is, then I would like to know the
details.
Listen husbands,
getting your wife to listen and be submissive to you is not achieved through
this means. Just because you are physically stronger doesn’t give you the right
to turn her to your punching bag. We have heard and seen ugly situations
regarding this action.
Come on husbands! There are better ways to handle issues. If she is stubborn and doesn’t listen to you, then you need to know how to handle the situation. So, what do you do?
“How can I get her
to listen without beating her?” you may ask.
I would say “Go
back to genesis”. Go back to the beginning of your relationship, before you
decided to tie the knots. How were you resolving and managing your differences?
What was the strategy being used? I believe that strategy can still be used now
you are married.
You must talk,
talk, talk and talk. Communication is key. Instead of using your fists, go out
of the scene to cool off. This would give both of you time to evaluate the
issue on ground.
Both of you must
want the marriage to work, because if you do, then you must agree to find
solution to your disagreements. A lot of sacrifices and compromise come from the
wife. You, as the husband must sacrifice and compromise too! Marriage is all about giving in other to
receive. You should be considerate and learn to ‘feel’, be sensitive, listen
when she pours her heart to you. LISTEN.
Take time to take
her out with the children- enjoy family time, appreciate and complement her
appearance and efforts. Love her and show her respect. If you try to do all or
even some of these tips, you won’t need to use your fists again! She would listen and be submissive.
Remember, your wife
is not your slave, she is your partner, she is part of you and you should treat
her with kindness and tenderness.
“She is
troublesome, she would not appreciate all these” you may say.
Then I want to ask
why did you chose to marry her. As adults, we are responsible for our decisions.
Well, those reasons are not so important right now. What is important is how to
keep your fists off her! How to get the
best out of the marriage.
I just want to
encourage you to be hopeful and try out the tips mentioned above and see what
happens. Pray always about your marriage and God would restore it. I would love to hear how you manage your disagreements.
More tips, I would
say.
Tell someone about
this blog, thanks.
"You husbands must be careful of your wives, being
thoughtful of their needs and honoring them as the weaker sex. Remember that
you and your wife are partners in receiving God's blessings, and if you don't
treat her as you should, your prayers will not get ready answers." 1st Peter 3:7.
"A successful and lasting marriage will always be a triangle. It will involve a woman, a man and God"- Daniel Akin
Linda Aliogo
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