The world we live in was created by God with words. This shows you the power behind words as what you say has a lot of power and influence. It was ‘words’ that led to your meeting your husband (speaking) before it blossomed into a relationship which eventually climaxed as marriage.
You enjoyed each other’s company, you laughed because of the fun things you say and do together. You shared jokes! All these are possible just because of our language-our words.
How come things changed?
The jokes are no more there, the laughter has since been forgotten! Rather than have peace, there is now war?
Where did these ‘words’ go wrong? How did you ‘talk’ yourself into this unpleasant situation?
Your words can make your husband love you, they can also make him leave!
As a wife, you should know that husbands loved to be respected. You should reverence your husband. This gives him a sense of pride, authority, and control as the head of the family. This actually affects his self-esteem and ego. This is so important to him- the way he is seen by family, friends and colleagues.
What am I saying?
You should learn to use words to encourage and boost your husband’s confidence rather than otherwise! Allow him to be the ‘head’ just like CHRIST is the ‘head’ of the church. Allow him enjoy the role as it were.
For instance, the economy is bad everywhere in the world and a lot of people are out of jobs! Your husband is not the only one, so why punish him with your words constantly! Reminding him of how useless he is financially to the family would not take you anywhere rather, it would cause deep cuts that both of you would regret and remember, especially your husband!
Your words should be soothing, encouraging and hopeful! He should know after the day’s activities seeking for employment, there is someone there to comfort him of his frustrations. That person is no other one than YOU! Be there for him when needs someone.
I am not saying you should condole and encourage lazy behavior but hey as adults, you know where and when to draw the line. You know genuine and lazy efforts right?
I know you feel the pressure too but, he is more under pressure than you are! He is already feeling like a failure! A loser!
You do not need to remind him again.
Keep hope alive and let him know you believe in him. Let your husband understand that he is capable, he can and he will make it in life by HIS grace.
Even when there is a quarrel or fight, your words should not be bullets or missiles against him. Fight clean and away from the kids!
What do I mean?
Keep the kids away from the scene, learn to iron out your differences when the children are away or in bed. Keep the discussion to the current problem and nothing else. CONTROL your anger and of course your words!
It is not easy, you would say, but who says marriage is easy! But with God, nothing is impossible.
Remember, the kids hear you and copy what you say. You are meant to build your home and not tear it down with your words! I believe you are wise.
Be gentle with your words on your husband and other people would wonder why he showers you with so much affection. It is all about giving to receive.
Ponder on this and let me know what you think!
"When words are many, sin is not absent, but he who holds his tongue is wise"- Prov.10:19
"Words are some of the most powerful and important things I know...Language is the tool of love and weapon of hatred. It's the bright red warning flag of danger..and the stone foundation of diplomacy and peace"- Unknown
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