The
world we live in was created by God with words. This shows you the power behind
words as what you say has a lot of power and influence. It was ‘words’ that led
to your meeting your husband (speaking) before it blossomed into a relationship
which eventually climaxed as marriage.
You
enjoyed each other’s company, you laughed because of the fun things you say and
do together. You shared jokes! All these are possible just because of our
language-our words.
How
come things changed?
The
jokes are no more there, the laughter has since been forgotten! Rather than have peace, there is now war?
Where
did these ‘words’ go wrong? How did you ‘talk’ yourself into this unpleasant
situation?
Your
words can make your husband love you, they can also make him leave!
As a
wife, you should know that husbands loved to be respected. You should
reverence your husband. This gives him a sense of pride, authority,
and control as the head of the family. This actually affects his self-esteem
and ego. This is so important to him- the way he is seen by family, friends and colleagues.
What
am I saying?
You
should learn to use words to encourage and boost your husband’s confidence
rather than otherwise! Allow him to be
the ‘head’ just like CHRIST is the ‘head’ of the church. Allow him enjoy the
role as it were.
For
instance, the economy is bad everywhere in the world and a lot of people are
out of jobs! Your husband is not the only one, so why punish him with your
words constantly! Reminding him of how useless he is financially to the family would not take you anywhere
rather, it would cause deep cuts that both of you would regret and remember,
especially your husband!
Your
words should be soothing, encouraging
and hopeful! He should know after the day’s activities seeking for
employment, there is someone there to comfort him of his frustrations. That
person is no other one than YOU! Be there for him when needs someone.
I am
not saying you should condole and encourage lazy behavior but hey as adults,
you know where and when to draw the line. You know genuine and lazy efforts
right?
I
know you feel the pressure too but, he is more under pressure than you are! He
is already feeling like a failure! A loser!
You
do not need to remind him again.
Keep
hope alive and let him know you believe in him. Let your husband understand
that he is capable, he can and he will make it in life by HIS grace.
Even
when there is a quarrel or fight, your words should not be bullets or missiles
against him. Fight clean and away from the kids!
What
do I mean?
Keep
the kids away from the scene, learn to iron out your differences when the
children are away or in bed. Keep the discussion to the current problem and
nothing else. CONTROL your anger and of course your words!
It
is not easy, you would say, but who says marriage is easy! But with God,
nothing is impossible.
Remember,
the kids hear you and copy what you say. You are meant to build your home and
not tear it down with your words! I
believe you are wise.
Be
gentle with your words on your husband and other people would wonder why he showers
you with so much affection. It is all about giving to receive.
Ponder
on this and let me know what you think!
Thanks.
"When words are many, sin is not absent, but he who holds his tongue is wise"- Prov.10:19
"Words are some of the most powerful and important things I know...Language is the tool of love and weapon of hatred. It's the bright red warning flag of danger..and the stone foundation of diplomacy and peace"- Unknown
Linda Aliogo
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